Newlyweds
by Lennith
Summary: Can two dysfunctional people form a functional marriage? With Kazuma and Ryuhou the road is sure to be bumpy... Yaoi, MM, KazuRyu, Ryukazu
1. Mawwiage

**Title:** The Newlyweds

**Author:** Lennith

**Rating:** R, possibly NC-17 deciding on my twisted imagination.

**Pairing:** KazuRyu, RyuKazu

**Disclaimer**: I am not a genius; hence I did not create Scryed! The story and all characters belong to Bandai, Yosuke Kuroda, Yasunari Toda, the little green gods, Bill Gates, and whoever else contributed to their creation. Namely, not me!

**Warnings:** This fic is YAOI! If you don't know that term, I highly suggest you look it up before reading. Though if you're reading Scryed fanfiction, chances are you know perfectly well what yaoi is and you're looking for some man on man action. Well, rest assured, you've come to the right place

**A/N: **Uwa, I've enjoyed writing "Underground" so much that I thought I'd try my hand at writing two fics at a time! "Newlyweds" has nothing to do with "Underground," just for the record. I just decided that since "Underground" is something of a more serious fic that I'd allow myself to blow off some steam with a humorous fic. Have no fear, I still plan to have smut involved! I'm not sure if it'll be as graphically citrus as my other child, but we'll see how things develop. In any case, "Newlyweds" is still set in the Scryed universe, only the battles have been fought, Ryuhou and Kazuma have heeded their attraction to one another, and tada…

ixi

**Mawwiage.**

"Will you marry me?" 

Kazuma set down his glass carefully. Even so the movement was unbalanced and the liquid sloshed around a bit. "'Scuse me?" he slurred.

"I asked if you would marry me," Ryuhou repeated. He took another quick sip from his own glass.

Kazuma gaped. Sure, he was drunk but this was even to weird for that. Ryuhou wouldn't ask him to marry him, would he? He tried to let his addled brain process the information.

"Idiot! Will. You. Marry. Me!" Ryuhou growled, losing all patience with his lover's obvious incomprehension. The activity in the bar suddenly slowed. Ryuhou twitched irritably. He had hoped not to attract attention.

The rogue alter burst into laughter. "Ryuhou, you're drunk!"

"Am not!" Ryuhou retorted, casually setting his glass down on to thin air. The shattering of the glass and Kazuma's now stifled laughter didn't help the attracting attention issue.

"Ok, Fine, so I'm drunk. I still want to know if you'll marry me," he slurred in a quieter tone.

Kazuma stopped laughing and gaped at his partner again. "You're serious?"

Ryuhou nodded and reached into his pocket. After some fumbling he managed to produce a simple gold band and offered it to Kazuma. "I'm serious," he said with a small nod and a blush. The redhead continued to stare in a glazed manner. Ryuhou felt his heart sink and clumsily moved to pocket the trinket again. "Never mind," he sighed dejectedly. To his surprise Kazuma's hand reached out and grabbed the hand before it could disappear into the pocket again. Now it was Ryuhou's turn to stare in confusion.

"We fight like cats and dogs," Kazuma said solemnly.

"I know."

"We've done some pretty rotten things to each other," Kazuma continued.

"We have," Ryuhou agreed, the beginnings of a smile beginning to tug at the corners of his firm lips. Kazuma didn't seem to be arguing, just making sure they both knew what they were getting into.

Kazuma was quiet a second and broke into wicked smile. "And I'm on top four times out of five. I should be the one purposing."

Ryuhou snorted with indignation. "Well will you or not already?"

Kazuma pried the ring from Ryuhou's fingers and pretended to appraise it.

"Why should I marry you?" he asked, enjoying the little game.

Ryuhou knew at this point that Kazuma was playing with him and didn't allow his frustration to surface. "Because even though you're a good for nothing, lazy, clumsy, uneducated, scruffy looking vagabond, there's nobody else I'd want to be with until I die."

Kazuma blushed beneath his tan and finally allowed himself a real smile. He slid the ring onto his finger, testing the new weight on his hand.

"Alright. Consider yourself stuck with me," he grinned and leaned closer to Ryuhou, wrapping and arm around him in a possessive manner.

A rare, true smile lit Ryuhou's face and caught in his emotion he quickly pulled Kazuma's head aside to deliver a firm enthusiastic kiss. So much for the ploy of avoiding attention. One man choked on his whisky and the barmaid dropped her tray.

"Where do you want to go on our honeymoon?" he asked in a low purr. He felt Kazuma's heart jump at that prospect.

"Anyplace that has a sturdy bed and a 'do not disturb' sign for the door," the man replied wickedly.

Ryuhou gave him a gentle shove. "Idiot… Be serious, will you?"

"I was being serious!" Kazuma pouted.

To be continued… 

ixi

**A/N:** Weeeeee, I know it's short, but this is more like just a prologue anyway XD Don't worry, if you didn't find this funny, it WILL get better. Haha! Thank you for reading and stay tuned! I'm hoping to keep this going with more frequent updates but shorter chapters. Tell me what you think so far!


	2. Pesky Interlopers

**Title:** The Newlyweds

**Author:** Lennith

**Rating:** R, possibly NC-17 deciding on my twisted imagination.

**Pairing:** KazuRyu, RyuKazu

**Disclaimer**: I am not a genius; hence I did not create Scryed! The story and all characters belong to Bandai, Yosuke Kuroda, Yasunari Toda, the little green gods, Bill Gates, and whoever else contributed to their creation. Namely, not me!

**Warnings:** This fic is YAOI! If you don't know that term, I highly suggest you look it up before reading. Though if you're reading Scryed fanfiction, chances are you know perfectly well what yaoi is and you're looking for some man on man action. Well, rest assured, you've come to the right place

**A/N: **Woo! I'm really encouraged by the reactions I've gotten so far! Thank you, **Brightdreamer** and **RedHedLvr** for your reviews! Ahaha, I'm just so pleased people seem to be liking it. I generally don't like fanfics involving marriage either, but the idea of Ryuhou and Kazuma trying their hand at domestic life just seemed too funny to me. And I'm thinking the honeymoon might have to dip into heavy-citrus because I'm so inspired by this new baby! strokes it Sorry if I do some Mimori-bashing in this chapter! It's not so much that I dislike her, but she's so easy to use for comedic affect. I was going to go straight to the honeymoon and just have the boys elope, but **Brightdreamer** inspired me to actually show some form of ceremony… and the reactions of the other characters XD

ixi

**Pesky Interlopers.**

"Ryuhou!"

Mimori welcomed the arrival of the two alter users with her typical wail. She exploded from her doorway to latch on to Ryuhou, burying her face in his uniform. "You were gone so long! We were all so worried about you!"

Ryuhou shifted uncomfortably. "Kazuma and I are just fine, Mimori." He closed his eyes, willing the fingers to release him but they tightened and drew him closer. "Uh, Mimori, could you let go?"

The dark haired woman blinked up at him in confusion. "Let go? Why?" She obviously thought he was playing because she gripped even tighter.

"Mimori," Ryuhou said, "I'm a married man now." Although Ryuhou was a near expert at keeping his feelings behind a cold mask, this time he had to struggle not to have a snigger at his friend's expense.

"Wh-wha-what!" Mimori stuttered in shock. Ryuhou managed to lift his hand from her grip and dangle the now ringed digit in front of her face.

"People might get the wrong idea," Ryuhou managed to continue gently. Mimori, however, did not relent.

"B-b-but who!" She finally demanded, every emotion from fear to anger passing over her usually pleasant features. "Where is she? How could you do this to m-"

"HEY LADY!" Kazuma bellowed, finally coming around the corner from where he had greeted Kanami in the garden. "Hands off my property!"

Mimori's jaw dropped and her face went white as snow. "No… Not… Kazuma" she asked, looking into Ryuhou's face, desperate for a signal of denial. To her terror Ryuhou never showed her one, and Kazuma, trailed by Kanami, plucked her off of Ryuhou as if she were a clinging child.

"Kazu-kun?" Kanami tilted her head quizzically, obviously not quite clear on what was going on.

"Ryuhou and I decided to get hitched!" Kazuma declared proudly, twining an arm around his lover's waist.

Kanami still looked vaguely confused and Mimori looked like a fish out of water, her mouth working furiously but unable to utter a sound.

Ryuhou rubbed his temple, beginning to feel a little embarrassed. "Kanami, Kazuma and I got married," he explained clearly. Kanami giggled happily and Mimori wailed in despair.

"Oh, how wonderful! I'm happy for you two," Kanami bubbled happily. "Oh, but why weren't we invited to the wedding?"

Kazuma grinned. "Oh, we didn't bother with one."

"AHA! If you didn't have a ceremony you aren't really married!" Mimori exclaimed, finally finding a way to refute the marriage.

"Sure we are! We exchanged rings and vows! What difference does a stupid stuffy ceremony make?" Kazuma retorted.

"It's not like any ceremony we had would be legal," Ryuhou explained. "We're both men."

"Oh, but you two should still have some sort of formal wedding," Kanami murmured thoughtfully.

"Look, we just wanted to let you two know that we'll be away on our honeymoon as soon as I receive Kazuma's new passport," Ryuhou croaked as he felt his patience running thin. At the word "honeymoon" Mimori almost fainted.

Kanami shook her head vigorously. "That just isn't proper! Let us have a party for you! We promise it'll be fun, right Mimori-san?"

Mimori managed a weak nod.

Kazuma began to look slightly interested. "What kind of party?"

Kanami thought a moment. "Well, we can just invite our friends and feast in your honor, I suppose."

Kazuma swiveled to look at Ryuhou, who was still looking very suspicious, questioningly. "That doesn't sound too bad."

Mimori perked up a little bit. "We could have drinks too. And maybe games or something"

"Wow! I dunno, Ryuhou, this sounds like it might be fun."

Ryuhou still looked skeptical. "I don't know, Kazuma, don't you think this might be embarrassing?" he asked in a hushed voice.

"No way! Please please please let's have this party thing? Come on, we can get Urizane back if we get him drunk enough," Kazuma pleaded like a child.

"They're planning something else, can't you see that?"

"Awwwww, come on Ryuhou, what's the worst that can happen. Say we'll have this wedding? Think of the presents! Think of the booze!"

Ryuhou's teeth started to rattle as Kazuma tugged on him repeatedly. "Ok! Fine! On one condition," Ryuhou said, raising his hand significantly.

"What's that?"

Ryuhou smirked and crossed his arms. "No sex until the honeymoon then."

Kazuma's face resembled Mimori's earlier fish impression. "B-b-but…"

"Well, since you seem to want to follow tradition all of a sudden we might as well follow it completely," Ryuhou said with a gleam of triumph in his eye. If Kazuma was going to force him to be humiliated it would only be justice to make him feel equally miserable.

"But you said that's going to be at least two weeks from now," Kazuma argued pitifully.

"Think you can't handle it?"

Kazuma toed the dirt stubbornly. "Fine, no sex until the honeymoon."

Ryuhou nodded in agreement and the pact was made. The two finally turned back to the girls, including them in the conversation once more.

"Okay! We'll do this wedding thing," Kazuma announced happily.

"Oh how wonderful," Mimori tittered. "Now let me take your measurements!" Kazuma yelped as he was suddenly dragged by the woman into the house and then attacked with a measuring tape.

"What are you doing to me!" Kazuma shrieked as some soft frilly fabric was draped over his shoulder experimentally.

"Why, you can't get married without a wedding dress, Kazuma," Mimori grinned wickedly, her voice dripping with vengeful thoughts. "Don't worry, even though you have no figure at all I'll be sure to make you look radiant."

"Wha- Help me, Ryuhou, Kanami, anyone!" Kazuma flailed. But Ryuhou was busy trying to hold back any laughter and Kanami was fidgeting uncomfortably.

"What do you think about pink bows, Kanami-chan?" Mimori asked cheerfully.

"Oh please no, not pink bows!"

"I think Ryuhou should wear the dress, Mimori," Kanami said brightly.

Mimori snorted. Now it was Ryuhou's turn to gag and go pale. "What?"

"Well, you have a much nicer figure than Kazuma does. Your waist is more feminine," Kanami explained.

Murder filled Ryuhou's glittering red eyes. "Kazuma, you still want this wedding?"

"No! Please, get it off, get it OFF!" Kazuma wailed, still trying to escape the pins and ruffles.

"Ok, let's run for it then." Ryuhou grabbed hold of Kazuma's collar and dragged him off through the door before the girls had a chance to react. Still shedding ribbons, Kazuma leaped into the passenger side of the car as Ryuhou revved the engine. By the time the girls managed to come out the door, the escaping couple was already well on their way.

"Oh my god, I didn't think girls were capable of that sort of cruelty," Kazuma shivered.

"Well, I tried to warn you," Ryuhou said languidly, shifting gears. "Girls get some funny notions in their heads about weddings."

Kazuma nodded in agreement, finally shedding the last ribbon and tossing it out the window to float into the wilderness. "Well at least now there's no sex ban," he sighed in relief.

"You agreed, not until the honeymoon." Ryuhou reminded him.

"Y-you're not going to hold me to that since we're not doing that party thing, right?"

Ryuhou didn't answer, but smiled a fraction.

Kazuma brought his head between his knees. "Ooooooooh shit. This sucks."

To be continued… 

ixi

**A/N:** Ohohoho! Poor Kazuma. It's going to be mighty hard to keep his vow of celibacy until his passport arrives, eh? Bet you're all wondering what he's going to do to occupy himself during that time, eh eh? XD Well hold on to your hats! It shall come soon!


	3. Patience is a Virtue

**Title:** The Newlyweds

**Author: **Lennith

**Rating:** R, possibly NC-17 deciding on my twisted imagination. For if and when there's a lemon, this story is posted on adultfanfiction as well. The address is "adultfan. aff story.php?no544184166" Add slashes where there are spaces and remove the quotations, of course.

**Pairing:** KazuRyu, RyuKazu

**Disclaimer**: I am not a genius; hence I did not create Scryed! The story and all characters belong to Bandai, Yosuke Kuroda, Yasunari Toda, the little green gods, Bill Gates, and whoever else contributed to their creation. Namely, not me!

**Warnings:** This fic is YAOI! If you don't know that term, I highly suggest you look it up before reading. Though if you're reading Scryed fanfiction, chances are you know perfectly well what yaoi is and you're looking for some man on man action. Well, rest assured, you've come to the right place

**A/N: **Might as well press onward, since I'm inspired! Now, what IS Kazuma going to do with at least two weeks of celibacy on his hands? And where is the honeymoon going to be? Actually, I'm not sure either XD If anyone has suggestions and I don't get to it today, maybe post them in a review? I can't guarantee that I won't just press onward after this chapter though. This really is too much fun.

ixi

**Patience is a Virtue.**

"OWW!"

Kazuma skidded across the bathroom floor after being forcefully expulsed from the shower. He fell on his rear, tenderly clutching the side of his face as he heard the water turn off. "Ryuhou, that hurt! You were enjoying that too, why'd you have to hit me and toss me out on my bare ass!"

Ryuhou stepped out of the shower and wrapped a towel around his waist, a calm face plastered over his obvious sexual frustration. "If I hadn't you would have wound up going back on your end of the bargain," he replied coolly, handing Kazuma a towel. "You agreed, no sex until the honeymoon."

"I can't believe you're still holding me to that," Kazuma grumbled. He snatched the towel and started drying his wet auburn hair roughly. "It's already been a week, and I've been a good boy. Besides, I just wanted to touch you a bit." He pouted, wondering if he'd be able to sway his stubborn lover into seeing things his way.

Ryuhou blushed, but pretended he didn't. "You just asked me to suck you off, I don't think that counts as 'touching me a bit'."

Kazuma grinned, his body reacting to the image appropriately. "So I got a little carried away," he drawled, standing up and draping himself over Ryuhou's back. He sighed contentedly. He was actually reasonably satisfied with just being able to touch his older lover, but would never admit it. "I'm sorry, okay? I just can't help myself. I'm trying to be good, but you're just too fuckin' hot," he chuckled, nibbling at Ryuhou's neck. He felt his lover twitch, could feel that Ryuhou needed it just as badly as he did.

"Kazuma, stop," Ryuhou commanded.

"What, I'm not doing anything!"

"Your hands certainly are," Ryuhou said with a smirk. Sure enough Kazuma's hands had already wandered to Ryuhou's hips.

"Hehe, woops. Sorry. See what I mean?" Kazuma released Ryuhou regretfully and occupied himself with brushing Ryuhou's hair. Both men had taken to helping each other with the menial tasks of living long before, both enjoying the pampering silently. "Honestly though, Ryuhou, I don't understand why you're being so stubborn," Kazuma continued after a moment.

"Can't you just jerk off and get it out of your system?" Ryuhou asked in exasperation.

"Come on, you know only you can satisfy me now," Kazuma jeered, only half joking. "Why do you want to wait for the honeymoon anyway?"

Ryuhou blushed again momentarily. "I just… forget it."

Kazuma pouted but didn't press the matter.

ixi

"Married?"

Kazuma nodded and took his shot, pounding the glass into the wood counter of the bar. "Yeah, and he says no sex until the honeymoon," the rogue said with a brokenhearted sigh.

Tachibana looked perplexed but thoughtful. He was still attracted to Kazuma but had long given up hope on any sort of relationship beyond friendship with the man. The friendship he offered had been accepted though, and he was happy enough with that. Kazuma knew his sexual orientation and his attraction but didn't hold it against him in any way. Instead Kazuma had found it a relief to have someone to talk to when he was having difficulty with Ryuhou, which was more or less frequently.

"So why'd you call me out here? Need a little fling?" Tachibana joked, batting his eyelashes coyly.

Kazuma blushed a little but laughed. "I wish I could take you up on that, but no thanks buddy," he joked back, giving Tachibana a playful slap on the back.

"Well, why then?"

Kazuma stared into the empty glass for a moment. "When I asked Ryuhou why he was being so stubborn about it he started to say something and then stopped himself. You understand these things better than I do, so I thought you might know why."

"Hmm," Tachibana said, brows screwing together with thought. "Well, I assume you guys have sex regularly…"

"Hell yeah," Kazuma grinned with pride.

Tachibana ignored his interruption. "Maybe he just wants the honeymoon to be special. I mean, he already missed out on saving his virginity for after the wedding, and then he couldn't have a wedding at all…"

"Thank God," Kazuma shivered as the bartender refilled his shot glass. "I tried to talk him into one when the girls offered to throw us a party. That's how I got in this mess."

Tachibana winced. "That was a bad idea."

"No shit. Mimori tied me up in pink bows."

The shorter man cursed in sympathy, nursing his drink slowly. After a moment he continued. "In any case, he probably just wants your first night as a properly 'married' couple to be special. He could also be testing you though."

"Testing me?" Kazuma sat up straighter then took his shot.

Tachibana nodded, his purple hair bouncing with the motion. "He might be afraid your relationship is dependent on sex and be making sure that you two can handle something emotional, not physical. Though if he actually proposed to you, I still can't believe it, I wish I'd been there to see it, he probably isn't too worried about that."

Kazuma nodded in agreement. Either the drinks were getting to him or Tachibana was actually quite wise.

"It's probably more likely that he's testing your fidelity," Tachibana finished, both his thoughts and his drink.

The rogue snorted ironically. "He doesn't have to test that. I can only be satisfied by his body. He knows that."

Tachibana blinked, a little startled by the conviction in Kazuma's voice. He'd known the two had always had a tight bond, even as enemies, but to not be able to achieve sexual gratification except with one person? Tachibana had to admit, he was a little bit jealous. "Maybe you've told him but he just wants to make sure it's true."

"I can't think of anything else, so you're probably right," Kazuma sighed, shrugging helplessly. "So what should I do about it?"

Tachibana played with the ice in his now empty glass, clearly weighing the options in his mind. Finally he set the glass and leaned over to whisper conspirationally into Kazuma's ear. "If I were you, I'd get busy planning on how to make that night spectacular. How's that sound?" He finished off with a devious giggle.

Kazuma stared at his friend a moment and then broke into a sly grin of his own. "I think that's a grand idea," he agreed. "Thanks, Tachibana!" He gave the young man a peck on the cheek in thanks before he got up from the bar stool, leaving a pile of coins on the counter to pay his tab. "I swear, once I find someone who deserves ya I'll throw them your way!"

Tachibana just blushed and ordered another drink as his friend left.

ixi

When Kazuma came home Ryuhou was still fiddling with that device he called a "laptop." He snuck up behind his lover and gripping both of the man's shoulders affectionately and placed a kiss to Ryuhou's neck.

"You're back early," Ryuhou stated, closing the screen and turning in his seat to face his partner.

Kazuma smiled easily. "Yep. Just thought I'd pass our good news on to that Tachibana guy. Hope you don't mind."

Ryuhou's lips thinned momentarily. He knew Tachibana would have loved to have his place beside Kazuma. However, rather than beat around the bush, the younger man had plainly stated his feelings and also his resolution not to interfere to Ryuhou once he'd noticed the relationship. Only Tachibana, Urizane and presumably Eelian knew that the former rivals were in a relationship, and they'd figured it out on their own. Although Ryuhou's first instinct was to feel threatened that Kazuma had gone out with Tachibana he immediately dismissed the irrational accusation. Tachibana wasn't the type to go begging scraps from someone else's table. "That's fine," Ryuhou forgave after a moment.

"Did you book the tickets yet?" Kazuma asked, still enjoying the physical contact of being close to his lover.

Ryuhou gestured to the computer. "Just finished. Everything's all set. Still want it to be a surprise?"

Kazuma nodded. "Yup! I'll go anywhere, but it'll be kinda fun not knowing where."

Ryuhou smiled lightly. Kazuma seemed to be feeling better about the whole thing, which eased his conscience.

"Um, is it ok if I buy us some stuff for the vacation?" Kazuma asked. Ryuhou had given him credit cards as well as cash and told him that his fortune was now _their _fortune, but Kazuma still seemed uncomfortable spending too much of the money. He wasn't used to having money to burn and surprisingly still wasn't one to splurge.

Ryuhou blinked at the unusual request, but didn't much of it. "Sure, get whatever you want. You have credit now, so use it."

Kazuma grinned cheekily. "Alright! That'll give me something to occupy myself."

"You've decided to accept the agreement, then?" Ryuhou asked, confused as to what was going through his lover's head but not ungrateful for the turn of his attentions. It was getting harder and harder to force Kazuma to back off.

Kazuma nodded again. "Yeah, I just thought to myself that you must have some crazy reason for this, so as a good husband I should abide my wife's decisions."

Ryuhou frowned. "Domestic partner, if you will. I'm not your woman."

"I know, honey, I know."

Kazuma dodged a punch aimed at his stomach and scampered to the bedroom to change and plot out his course of action for the next day.

_To be continued…_

ixi

**A/N:** Kakaka! Man, I don't MEAN to keep throwing Tachibana into this mix, but I just adore the guy! Have pity on me and ignore my stupid repetition. You don't know how badly I'd like to throw some manmeat Tachibana's way, but I don't want to cornball my fics up TOO much… Hmm, oh well, maybe you guys let me know what you think. Anyway! Sorry not too much happened this chapter. I just thought it's be nice to have a little pre-honeymoon stuff to lead up to the grand event rather than just plopping the boys in some glorified love hotel. So yes! Please continue to review or contact me if needed 3 I gave out my contact information on the latest chapter of "Underground" if anyone needs me. Thank you again for reading and I hope it was enjoyable!


	4. Leaving on a Jet Plane

**Title:** The Newlyweds

**Author: **Lennith

**Rating:** R! My imagination is evil and dirty. It's still a humor fic though!

**Pairing:** KazuRyu, RyuKazu

**Disclaimer**: I am not a genius; hence I did not create Scryed! The story and all characters belong to Bandai, Yosuke Kuroda, Yasunari Toda, the little green gods, Bill Gates, and whoever else contributed to their creation. Namely, not me!

**Warnings:** This fic is YAOI! If you don't know that term, I highly suggest you look it up before reading. Though if you're reading Scryed fanfiction, chances are you know perfectly well what yaoi is and you're looking for some man on man action. Well, rest assured, you've come to the right place. Unfortunately, most of my writing contains graphic lemons, which are to be posted on AFF. If the chapters seem clipped, it means I had to edit out a lemon, which will be happening a LOT from this chapter on. If you want to read the smut head over to "adultfan. aff story.php?no544184166" and throw in slashes where there are spaces, cause Ffnet eats slashes. Enjoy the ride!

**A/N: **Ohohoho, I am going to hell. gleeful **Eloy Brightdreamer** helped me decide the honeymoon destination and we plotted some sickeningly wonderful madness. Enjoy, my companions, enjoy.

ixi

**Leaving on Jetplane.**

"That's us."

Ryuhou got to his feet, smoothing the fabric of his sleek black suit hastily. Kazuma stopped gawking at the crowds of travelers and leapt to his feet as well.

"Boarding call for passengers of Air-O flight #1104. First class passengers for Air-O flight #1104," a sedate female voice repeated the announcement over the general din of the terminal.

"Do we get on now?" Kazuma asked as he struggled to collect the bags. While Ryuhou had traveled light with only a briefcase, Kazuma had stuffed a duffel and a small backpack to their natural limits with snacks, magazines, cds, batteries and games.

"Yes, we're in first class so we get to board first," Ryuhou explained, trying to calm Kazuma's high energy. The Lost-Ground native had understandably never had a proper trip on an airplane and was excited about his first experience.

"First class? Awesome! This is great," he laughed, so caught up in his glee that he gave Ryuhou a fairly showy kiss despite the crowded setting.

"Kazuma! Calm down!" Ryuhou reprimanded loudly. Kazuma's exuberance was beginning to annoy him. It didn't help that he hadn't eaten breakfast and was feeling queasy. It also didn't help that Kazuma had been good on his word and they'd both gone without sex. If Kazuma was going to start that sort of thing on the plane he wasn't sure what the hell he was going to do.

"Sorry! Hey, let's get on now, Ryuhou!"

Ryuhou's knees still felt a bit rubbery from the kiss and was still staring off into space.

Kazuma swallowed hard. Keeping his hands off of Ryuhou in an enclosed space for a few hours was not going to be much fun.

"Ryuhou!" He called again.

"Eh? Oh, yes, let's get on the plane," Ryuhou muttered quickly. Kazuma smirked and followed his lover obediently to the gate.

ixi

"Kazuma, please stop bouncing like that," Ryuhou said wearily. "It's going to make me sick."

Kazuma stopped mid bounce. Ryuhou did look a little paler than usual, and rather tired. "Sorry," Kazuma said sincerely. "This is just a lot of fun. Why don't you get some rest." He lifted the armrest between their leather seats and helped Ryuhou into a slightly more comfortable position. Though he hated to shut out the sight of the sky and the sea so far below him, he closed the window shade so Ryuhou could rest easier.

Ryuhou smiled a little at his lover's behavior, but only said a polite thank you. He closed his eyes and drifted to sleep.

ixi

A small bead of sweat trickled from Kazuma's forehead and continued to slide down his cheek. There. Was. No. Way. He. Could. Take. This. Anymore! In his sleep Ryuhou and leaned over to rest on his shoulder. Kazuma had been happy as a king, giving everyone on the plane a "That's right, this is MINE" grin. But then Ryuhou had started snuggling. And then he'd latched on to one of his legs. And now he was currently rubbing his hips against Kazuma's. It suddenly felt like it was 120 degrees in the airplane. Kazuma was sure he was going to do something that would most likely end in his arrest if this were to continue.

"Ryuhou! There's a cat on the WIIIIIIIIIIING!" Kazuma shrieked, shaking Ryuhou awake.

The man awoke with an obvious start. "Wh-What the… Kazuma?" Ryuhou looked confused and worried a moment.

"There's a cat on the wing, Ryuhou! LOOK!" Kazuma almost yelled, his voice sounding ridiculously tinny.

"Kazuma, just let me sleep," he grumbled. If this was how Kazuma was going to behave maybe they shouldn't have gone off on a vacation together.

"Ok, sorry," Kazuma said quickly and started bouncing again.

"Kazuma, I told you to stop bouncing!"

"But Ryuhou…"

"Stop it right now!"

Kazuma stopped, but ran his hand up Ryuhou's thigh.

"Kazu-"

"Ryuhou, let's go to the bathroom?"

Ryuhou stared at him. "The bathroom?" he repeated, making sure he was hearing this right.

"You were all over me in my sleep. If I hadn't woken you up both of us would have been in a very sticky situation. Pun intended."

Ryuhou blushed to his roots. He couldn't deny that he probably had been doing inappropriate things in his sleep.

"Ryuhou, please. Let's just go to the bathroom and get off?"

"Kazuma!" Ryuhou hadn't known this level of combined embarrassment and arousal was possible.

"Please? Just jerk me off, I don't care," Kazuma continued to plead.

"No! We're on an airplane full of people!"

"It's just the first class bathroom! Come on, we can join the mile high club!"

Ryuhou swallowed, his mouth suddenly dry. His stomach was rolling again, but so was his libido. He was starting to be swayed.

"Come on… I'm so horny right now and I've missed you so much. I'll never be able to sit still like this. After you'll feel better and you can sleep.

Ryuhou paused, then finally gave in. "Alright, come on. Let's go." He got to his feet, blushing like poppy. Kazuma allowed himself to pump his fist in victory once before happily following his lover.

The bathroom was larger than those in the coach class, but it was still a bit of a squeeze for them to both fit inside. Ryuhou, determined that if he was going to do this he would work quickly and thoroughly, maneuvered his way to sit on the toilet. He pulled Kazuma's hips to him eagerly and unzipped and unbuttoned his lover's pants.

Kazuma groaned under his breath, already anticipating what he'd been missing for too long.

ixi

"Ryuhou, I think we're here," Kazuma said hesitantly. He got no reply.

"I said I was sorry, please." After the miscommunication in the bathroom, Ryuhou had refused to speak to him. Ryuhou had sucked him off, but apparently the act had resurrected his nausea. Kazuma had been so caught up in his hormones had started to jerk him off over the sink, had misinterpreted Ryuhou's protests and the great alter user had puked all over the bathroom mirror. To say the least Ryuhou was very angry and Kazuma felt lower than a bow-legged caterpillar. That was definitely not how their first romp as a married couple was supposed to go.

A woman's voice came over the intercom and asked for the first class passengers to exit the craft. Ryuhou finally stirred.

"See, I was telling the truth."

Ryuhou looked rather miserable. His eyes were bloodshot, his skin sallow and his hair a crow's nest. "I see," he said coolly.

"Ryuhou… I feel awful. I promise I'll make it up to you," Kazuma pleaded, taking Ryuhou's hand in his.

With a sigh, Ryuhou finally relented. "Ok, but it better be good," he said with the suggestive arch of a brow.

To this Kazuma smiled in a disturbingly pious manner. "I'm sure it will be."

Finally on better terms, the newlyweds exited the plane, had their luggage ferried by a cavalry of baggage personnel, and took off in a taxi through a bright neon city.

To be continued… 

ixi

**A/N:** HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Oh goodie, I am so going to hell. Not only did I write a mile high lemon, but also I made poor Ryuhou puke his guts out. Talk about miscommunication, eh? chortles evilly I know this is awful. I know this was sort of a freebie lemon. Next chapter is Honeymoon! Stay tuned! Agh, editing these lemons is painful! I feel like the poor readers are getting cheated over here on Ffnet! Thank you, Cheza-chan and Rayz for your reviews over here!


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